A New Realization

So I mentioned here that I have no self control. That problem has been brought to the fore front of my life once more! Here is a taste of some of the things I can't resist for the life of me (note: I realize most of these are sugar based):

Chocolate
Swedish Fish
Sleep
Working 1 Million Hours
Deadliest Catch (Episodes, Marathons, etc.)
Making Michele Uncomfortable (It is like vomit, I can't stop it!)
Being Inappropriately Inappropriate
Listening to Loud Music (I can't stop - it's just not the same quiet)
Apples
Frosting
Procrastinating

and

Being a Total Whore

That being said... there are a lot of things that I left off - for my sanity and others, but I feel that you get the general idea.

I know what you are thinking - "No self control? Maybe she just really likes these things." It's true and that's what I thought at first and I may just like swedish fish and apples a lot. All of the others on the list I really can't help. For me to resist takes every fiber of my being. Some days I'm so exhausted from resisting - my obsessive, cyclical thinking just takes it out of me. That's where the problems come in and I decide it's easier to just give in - So I do! Then I make poor choices in my life.

So, if you want to help me out... stop me when I'm getting crazy. Or on the other hand, maybe you want to see me crazy. It is entertaining when I get carried away and maybe you get some sick joy out of the crash and burn of others. So be it! This is what I decided...

I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!

I like my lack of self control or discipline. It's fun! So I destroy my life and all things good in the world (like I have that power, phhhst!) at least I had a good time on the way out. That, my friends, was my realization at 4 am yesterday morning while I was throwing up and I've never been better or crazier! Okay, I've been crazier... but now I'm just rambling :}