Naked in the Dark ... Literally

So, as you all know, massage therapy has taken over the small thing that I had so hoped to call my life. Day and night, night and day, I have become obsessed. It's all that I think about, dream about and I'd say eat, but that would be weird. Who would have thought that being naked would become a thing that I would love? I mean, obviously you're covered with a sheet, they turn the lights down, put on soothing music and enjoy! So kids, here is the invitation, the line starts outside the door of Apartment 101 and I need the practice. Trust me, you have nothing to lose. And I won't even make you take your clothes off! But I mean, if you want . . .

Screwed

Well, another day has passed and I rage on. Have you ever met those people that have never worked in customer service or the food service business, but they still think they know how everything works! I had one of those tables tonight and I just wanted to kick them in the head (I am pretty limber and I think that it would be funny). They kept asking me for stuff over and over and if I couldn't be at their side every second that they needed me (because they weren't the only people in the store), they threw a little hissy fit. Then those people leave a crappy tip (28 cents - yeah, I can really pay rent with that, thanx) and you're screwed because they are dumb. Thankfully, the night went better after that and I got home relatively early. And thus preparations for a Fruitland trip began. I wish that everyone could have the experience of the Fruitland Branch, Consuelo and the marriage talks. I think that these experiences have only enriched my life. Fruitland virgins are some of my favorite people to take out there, sadly not everyone is ready. I hope that a certain someone who will remain nameless, but we will call "James" to protect his identity, didn't think that I was trying to disuede (opposit of persuede?) him from the trip. I mearly asked a few poingant questions like "Were you invited?" and "Why?". The Easter Egg hunt is a sacred tradition, the faint of heart should not attempt it. There are other testimonials out there, I am sure of this. All I can say is that this time tomorrow, we will be enjoying our spoils!!! Better luck next year!

The Wicked Rage is Blogging . . . finallly

So here it is fellow bloggers - I have finally been sucked in the blog world. I tried to stay away as long as possible. I mean seriously, we see each other all of the time. Almost everyday to be exact, but who is keeping track? I think that I would actually have a mild heart attack if anyone I didn't know read this and commented on my non-existent life. But anyway, on to bigger and better things.
For all of you that don't know, I have something called The Rage. When I get really upset and I mean really mad and annoyed, I have a tendency to rage on the perpetrator. Raging generally entails a raised voice, cutting looks (it is my super power to kill people with a glare) and general grudge holding for at least 5 minutes. I am positive that I am not the only one that has ever raged before. Maybe it's just genetic that it seems more prominent in my personality.
To those of you that have suffered from the wrath of one of my Rages, I apologize. But I don't guarantee your safety from further rages. Let's face it, you probably brought it on yourself.